My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
