Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
