gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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