you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
