dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
