Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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