i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
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