so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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