That reminds me...we need to get swords
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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