My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
All the doctor said was why
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
