he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
he had hair everywhere except his balls
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
