The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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