I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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