Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
