Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
