I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
