Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Randomize