hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
