no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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