She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
