Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
