addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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