he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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