You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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