My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
