how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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