The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
zippers are such a cool invention
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
