My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Walk of Shame today included voting.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
