thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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