I can't watch pbs sober anymore
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
