And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
