the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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