just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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