Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
