That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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