it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
