so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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