Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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