I just made out with a guy for $7.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Randomize
