We need to rekindle our bromance
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
