I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Randomize
