You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
