Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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