i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
