How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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