Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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