Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
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