So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
