he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
smell my finger.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Randomize
