Having a random hookup so left but love u
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
she looked like the before picture.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
